While the cat's away . . .

the ants and geckos and cockroaches will play! The kids and I came back last night from a 2 1/2 week trip to China. Erik came back for about 12 hours a week ago, but other than that, our house has just been maintained by our neighbors, so the word got out that there's a party in 06-18.

The ants who regularly reside here took advantage of our absence to further instill themselves into our home. Not only that, but they invited their gecko and cockroach friends to join them. I've been finding ant trails and gecko poop all over, and I'm terrified to open the garbage chute because when I did it this morning I disturbed a large roach congregation. One of them leaped to what he hoped was freedom, only to meet his dastardly end tangled up in my mop. I left him on the floor and the ants came to check him out. They have no shame.

It's me against the pests today, armed with Baygon, vinegar and a large supply of paper towels. Wish me luck.

China pictures

Here's me being lazy. I'm tired of putting pictures on my blog, my flickr acount, and my facebook page. So if you'd like to see pictures of our time here in China, please look here.

Bargaining

There is no better bargain shopping in all of Asia that in China, in my humble opinion. This may be because I'm fairly adept at doing it in the local language, or it may be sheer practice. But I've found no greater discrepancy between the initial asking price, and the amount they actually expect you to pay than here.

These bargains, however, come at a steep price to one's personal and emotional well-being. Bargaining here is not for the faint of heart, especially if you choose the more foreign infested markets where the vendors have acquired a functional level of annoying English phrases. To walk away with loads of dongxi ("stuff") at rock bottom prices, you must be willing to endure a constant barrage of these phrases which include, but are by no means limited to the following:
"Hello lady, you wanna buy some jacket?"
"Hi! Lady! How about some man t-shirt?"
"Hello, shoes! Look at shoe please!"
"Hello lady, Prada? Gucci? I have Coach!"
As you make your way through a tunnel of this pleading (with occasional grabbing - nothing turns me off like the grabbing) a stall might catch your eye. You pause. The vendors, sensing interest, being displaying their items within inches of your face. "You like this one? You want this color?" Don't rely on them to accurately provide answers to questions like, "Do you have one like this?" because to them, anything is similar. You're looking for a purse right? They're all purses, therefore all alike. You can count on them to pull out, at some point, something that is so hideous you will wonder who IS buying it. You also cannot depend on vendors to judge size correctly. Whatever size you need is exactly the size they have, as evidenced by conversations like,
Me: Do you have this in a different size?
Vendor: What size do you need?
Me: 6
Vendor: That's a size 6.
Me: It says 24 months.
Vendor: Yeah, six year olds can wear it too.

If you do find something of interest, then the delicate dance begins. Showing too much interest will let them know they can get a higher price. But if you're too tough and belligerent, you're in danger of leaving them crying and cursing on the floor. This may not seem like a bad idea to some, but you'll never be able to come back to that vendor, and at the very least you'll have to endure them throwing darts at you with their eyes every time you pass again. Do you really want that?

So when they do pull out just what you've been looking for, how do you proceed? Contain your enthusiasm. Make a doubtful look. Casually ask how much. They will assure you that this price they are about to say is special, just for you. It will be astronomical. Express utter shock and take a step back, as though what you've heard was even just a bit obscene. They will back track with something like, "ok, friend, ok, give me your best price."

Now comes the tricky part. What you just heard is probably up to 10 times the price they actually expect to get from you (case in point - yesterday I bought something for 60 kuai when she started at 520). Whatever you do, don't say a price yet. Ask them to give you a better price. If it's still not reasonable, then walk away. Immediately the price will drop to something more reasonable. Once it's within range of what you're willing to pay, come back and pick your price. Then stick to it. Don't raise it. They'll ask you to, but don't. 95 % of the time you can get it for what you start with. When you're done, give them all the assurance in the world that you will send all your friends to their stall in the future.

So there you have it. A brief tutorial on how to buy something for less than you'd pay anywhere else, if you're willing to navigate the process.

New Blog

Because I don't have enough to do already, I decided to start another blog, focused solely on our homeschool adventures. I could give you lots of reasons for it, but I plan to explain them there, so if you are interested, here it is: The Grand Experiment

Enjoy!

How not to see the Great Wall

Well, we've quite possibly ruined the Great Wall for our kids. We've been talking it up to them, reviewing the history, reminding them that "Bu dao Chang Cheng fei hao han" (whoever has not climbed the Great Wall is not a real man). All in an effort to encourage them to want to drive an hour and a half from where we're staying in China to climb a wall.

We awoke to the haziest day I've seen in a very long time. Visibility at about 1/4 mile. Not good. We hired a woman to drive us to the Wall. Ethan set his new watch to timer and started counting down. He still thinks that if I say "it takes an hour and a half" that we will arrive in precisely 90 minutes. I was praying that the haze would lift, or at least be less at the Wall. Forty five minutes into our drive, it started to rain. That wasn't what I had in mind.

It had stopped by the time we got to the Wall, but the clouds looked mean. We bought tickets to take the chair lift up and the alpine slide down. As we touched down at the top, the thunder and lightning began in earnest. Rain we can manage, but thunder and lightning when you're on the highest, most open spot around we cannot. We squeezed into one of the towers with all the other poor fools who chose today for their Great Wall adventure. We ate our snacks. We took some pictures. The rain stopped so we ran to the next tower after tying Megan's adult size rain poncho around her waist. How can someone look so adorable in a five kuai rain poncho?

They stopped the chair lift after we got off, and the alpine slide was out of the question (it was more of a water slide at that point). When they did reopen it, we joined the long queue of people regretting their Great Wall trip. We found our driver and headed for the nearest McDonald's so as to salvage our journey and ensure the possibility that one day, when we say, "Hey kids, you want to go back to the Great Wall?" they won't scream and run.

Oh well. We've seen it before, and the kids really had great attitudes (it's amazing how much easier it is when the parents maintain good ones too). Pictures to follow.

Thoughts from China

Visiting China is always a barrage of old and new, surprising and not so surprising. Here are some of the things I've noticed/experienced/enjoyed/sighed about:

1. Words keep coming back to me. At the store I was buying Ethan a watch, and I wanted an instruction manual. Poof - the words popped into my mind. Thankfully, they were the right ones. Last night at my great massage, I remembered "pressure" and "relax." I should really learn more massage vocabulary. Very important.
2. China is cheap! Yeah, I know prices keep going up and the dollar is dropping, but I bought watercolor paper, sketch paper, drawing pencils, Chinese paint brushes, and notebooks for my kids today. I spent $10 total.
3. I love Chinese street popcorn! Last night I brought home two bags after standing on a breezy walking bridge watching a man make it. It's worth the wait, especially for 3 kuai.
4. China smells. Not just bad smells - good ones too. But there are always smells. I like steamed sweet potato and pineapple, but could do without stinky tofu and suspicious bathroom odor.
5. No Chinese food equals the Chinese food in China. Cashew chicken, spicy beans, broccoli, tofu, sweet and sour pork - it's all good.
6. Only being here a week, I can tolerate these things, but this is what I want to say out loud in my more carnal moments, "Stop staring at me, stop talking about me, don't push me, don't steal my cab, don't tell me what to do with my kids, wait until I get out of the subway before you try to get in, and whatever you do, don't honk at me." There, that's out of my system.
7. I miss having a water dispenser! I know we can get them in Singapore, but they're just so darn cheap here it seems criminal to pay that much for water I can get out of the tap. Tap is not an option here.
8. I had forgotten what pollution looks like. It's strange when the building 50 meters away is a bit hazy.
9. I love the fashion freedom here. If you're just running out to the store, why not wear your flannel teddy bear pajamas?
10. There are probably a lot of products that can be purchased in China, but when you go to the store and stare at the characters on the package, you really can't tell the difference between powdered sugar and corn starch. Note to self- study more characters.

We are enjoying ourselves immensely here, despite and maybe sometimes because of the cultural quirks. Our kids are soaking in time with old friends (as am I!) and asking questions that betray their tropical upbringing, "Why does the sun come up so early? Why is it so cold?" (it's 75 degrees).

Check out our flickr account for pictures of our Great Wall adventure.

Megan's quotes

Megan comes by this trait honestly - she likes to quote movies. My brother and I have been known to have entire conversations just quoting movies. He starts it. Usually.

Her first favorite movie quote was from Night at the Museum. She'd walk up to someone, and say with all the toughness a little red headed five year could muster, "D'ya wanna dance hot dog? D'ya wanna dance?!"

The next was unintentional - Erik and I were watching Hairspray one evening, and she wandered out of her room. She watched it long enough to see the line, "I'd make EVERY day Negro day!" and said it all the next day. Again, cute, but we told her maybe she shouldn't repeat that outside of our house.

Most recently, after watching Shrek, she's been saying in her best Eddie Murphy imitation, "I know! I go witCHU!"

I don't know what else to say about this. I just thought it was amusing enough to share.

Life, Made Possible by Opposable Thumbs

I had no idea how important it is to have opposable thumbs. I guess you never appreciate something until you don't have it. Not that I don't have a thumb - I just have limited use of my left one. Last Monday while cutting pineapple I managed to cut a sizable chunk off the end of it. I mean enough that I thought, "I wonder if I need stitches" except I don't know how they could sew back on the small piece that was completely severed. Yeah, we're all about severing body parts in this house. At least I refrained from shaking my thumb in response to the pain like Erik did when he cut his finger. There are still splatters of blood on the refrigerator.

It didn't stop bleeding completely for about 24 hours. That's right, feel sorry for me. But my point is that it's amazing what I can't do now that all the nerves in the end of my thumb are exposed. I tried to do beading with Megan the other day. It was excruciatingly painful. I had to quit. I can't open things with caps. I can't text message, which in Singapore is essential. And the list goes on. Maybe it sounds minimal, but observe throughout your day how many times you use the end of your thumb.

Asia's "greenest" city?

My announcement that there was a plastic bag for empty cans near the cooler was met by a chorus of "Wah! Gina - so green lah!" from our Singaporean friends at the BBQ. Green, for suggesting that we recycle our cans? Green for 1985 maybe.

But such is the sad state of affairs in Singapore, the "greenest" city in Asia. It is green by physical description, but by no means in its commitment to the environment, unfortunately. Though the rumblings of "going green" are present here as they seem to be everywhere now, Singapore is slow to respond. From what I understand, the sentiment here is that Singapore is a small country and therefore its "carbon footprint" must be small. But a recent study of impact on the environment ranked Singapore #22 out of the world. This, from a country that is 15 by 25 miles long.

In some ways, Singaporeans could seem like they are environmentally conscious - they rarely run air con at home, take cold showers and generally use cold water for everything, use public transport, reuse many items like plastic bags. But as a recent magazine article here pointed out, that's not green, it's cheap. They want to save money. Singaporeans like comfort and convenience as much as the next human. Maybe more.

I don't mean this to be an indictment against Singapore, but it's frustrating to try to be environmentally conscious in a country that doesn't seem to care. Though many stores now sell reusable bags, actually using them is a struggle not just because of the strange looks I get, but because Mustafa (where I do most of my shopping) won't let you. Since you can check out at any of the plethora of checkout counters there, they cinch your bags closed with plastic ties. Can't do that with reusable bags. Instead, I just nag them to put more items in one bag so I have fewer, which is tiring. They're resistant. And recycling? You have to go find it. There is a place near us that takes metal and glass, but we have to drive to find a place for paper and cardboard. There is no encouragement to use such facilities.

Hybrid cars have finally come to Singapore, though I believe you need about $50,000 US to purchase one. I've debated lately getting rid of my car, or going back to using public transport more often, but I confess, with homeschooling, my time is precious and the thought of doing so stresses me out. So here I am pointing my finger back at myself. I'll do my part to take cold, short showers, bring my reusable bags or recycle the plastic ones, not run my AC unless I'm dripping, recycle what I can, but the reality is, if the people around me aren't pushing me to do it, I'm afraid I'm tempted to go with the flow and keep sucking the earth dry.

In my dreams, I build a house that is as eco-friendly as possible, with solar panels and an incinerator for garbage, and anything else I can afford to do to make less of an impact. I'll admit this desire is new for me, so I'm far from being labeled green (except it seems by Singaporean standards). Any suggestions on what else we can do here to save the earth, I'm open.

Inevitable

I received an email recently featuring pictures of how various aspects of the world would look if women ruled. One of them was a car dealership which organized the cars according to color. That made perfect sense to me. Cars are vehicles which move people and objects from one place to another. I prefer ones that are gas efficient - if I could afford a hybrid here, I'd get one - and are colors I like such as red or orange.

I understand boys are different in this respect. I saw this firsthand today when Ethan peered over my shoulder in the car and said, "Mom, is that a Ferrari in front of us?" I said, "No, that's a Lamborghini." (the only reason I knew that is because it said Lamborghini on the back). All I could think about was how ugly Lamborhinis are, and how choosing yellow made it even less appealing. But I could practically hear Ethan drooling behind me.

"You think that's pretty cool, huh bud?"
"Yeah," he said in a long drawn out way.

I will never understand, but it seems my son is falling in with his own kind.

I should have known

I am happy to announce that I am once again the proud owner of a pair of white Gap pants which do NOT smell like fish. What finally did it for them was a good vinegar and water soak. Of course it was vinegar that did it! I should have known.

I think I may have become vinegar's biggest fan. Check out this website: 1001 uses for vinegar. I plan to try every one. In the last six months I've started to use vinegar for almost all my cleaning. It's cleaned things I couldn't get clean with anything else. I put it in my laundry instead of bleach to disinfect my clothes. It made my dingy sink white. It finally got that black scum off my tub. It removed the mold from the tiles in my bathroom. Mix it with baking soda and you've got an amazing scrub. And it's cheap and non-toxic!

Ok, now that I sound like an infomercial, rejoice with me that I no longer have fish smelling pants thanks to the wonder of vinegar.

Word to the Wise

Here's your friendly tip for the day: Never, ever, EVER, leave your omega 3 fish oil pill in your pocket. Why? Because when you wash your pants, it will dissolve and your pants will smell like fish FOREVER.

As you may have guessed, I know this from personal experience. I have washed this pair of pants three times, but it still smells. Any suggestions? I was thinking of soaking it in a bleach solution because it's white. I'll probably google "fish smell pants" later.

Just trying to help you learn from my mistakes.

The toe

People keep asking about Megan's toe. It's never visible to the general public because she herself refuses to view it. This requires a constant switching of socks, Crocs (but only inside!), shoes, flippers or loads of bubbles in the bathtub.

Today I convinced her to let me take a few pictures of the toe for you all to see. It looks fairly normal, but the lack of a tendon on the bottom side means that she can't curl it down. As a result, it sticks out a bit more than the others. It also seems to be much more chummy with its right neighbor than it was previously.

So here it is - judge for yourself how it looks. She is coming to terms with the fact that it may never curl down as much as the other ones, since she lost the tendon on the bottom. I for one think it might end up being a cool party game someday (hey, check this out - I can make my middle toe stick out straight!). Maybe that's just wishful thinking.


Can you tell which toe it is? If it's not obvious, it's the middle toe on the left foot. Her foot itself looks a little goofy because she has a rash right now. Notice how the skin between the second and third toes is connected a little higher than on the right foot. This is what seems to be making it lean to the right.


I think if you click on this picture you'll be able to see more clearly the pin mark in the end of the toe. Here it's a little more obvious that it's not back to normal, and may never be. Are you still letting your children wear Crocs outside?? They're evil!


I asked Megan to curl her toes down, which is when the injury becomes more pronounced. It's strange to feel it, because literally she has no power to push her toe down - there's no muscle there to make it happen. But we're thankful she still has a toe at all!

Now I Remember

Sometimes you need to do something you haven't done in a long time to remember why you vowed never to do it again. Like the Polar Bear Swim. Or drinking grape soda.

This morning I remembered why you should never, ever, under any circumstances, go to Mustafa on a) a Saturday morning after 8, b) with children, or c) on Saturday morning after 8 with children.

Because it sucks.

Some of my friends might think I'm crazy for going to Mustafa at 5:30 a.m. on Saturdays, but having the freedom to shop alone (and I mean totally alone) is worth so many hours of extra sleep. Mustafa, under the right conditions, is a glorious one stop shopping experience that I'm sure has saved me hundreds of dollars during my stay here. Under the wrong circumstances, it's right up there with heavy dental work on the torture scale.

What amazes me is how many people are willing to endure those conditions. Don't they know it's open 24 hours a day? I propose a country wide schedule where people can sign up for a time, thereby spacing out the number of shoppers. But no one can sign up for Saturdays from 5:30-7. I have dibs.

Pine Wood Derby

They say a good story needs conflict. If I may be so bold, this is a good story.

The annual Cub Scout Pine Wood Derby was today. Ethan's worked hard on his "Legomobile" (could it have been anything else?). He is a "Wolf Scout" which means one step up from Tigers, but below Bears and Webelos. We drove the long haul up to the Singapore American School in time for the Wolf Rank registration from 10-11. As we neared the school, Erik said, "Do you have your car buddy?"
To which Ethan replied a meek, "No."

Quick, think. It's 10:25. Registration ends at 11. The race is at 11:15. It takes about 1/2 hour to get here. We can't possibly go home and back in time.

I suggested we call our neighbor and ask a giant favor. Erik hesitated until I insisted that we had no other choice. Mark was willing, and he grabbed the car and headed our way.

Inside, the Derby was running late. Good thing because the car showed up at 11:10 still needing to be weighed. The cars can't be over 5 ounces. Ethan's was 5 ounces at home, but there it weighed just over. Get the knife! Erik frantically scraped chunks of wood out of the bottom of it. Weighed again - still over. Try another scale! Perfect.

We slipped our "late entry" car into the mix just in time for the first heat. Ethan's car was in it, and he won! Each car races three times. Second heat, 1st place! His third heat wasn't until the very end, but he easily pulled another 1st place finish.

But wait! The timers were broken today, so the cars were given points rather than times. There was another car who also placed first three times, so they had a face off. Ethan won by a nose.

Now as great as all that was, it meant we had to stick around another hour for the grand finals. Unfortunately Ethan didn't place in that race, but he was happy enough to be the Wolf Champion.

Erik does the last minute whittling to get Ethan's car down to the right weight.


Ethan's car is the second one in. We used magnets to make the top look like a Lego. I'd like to take credit for the Lego idea. As usual though, Erik gets full credit for the engineering.


We like to call this one, "Eat my dust."


The tie breaker for 1st place in the Wolf Rank - Ethan won!


Last year Ethan got an award for Best Design. He had no idea what it was for, but he was thrilled. This year he knew what he'd won and he was pretty proud!