I heard the scream from up in my bedroom. The "I'm in pain, prepare yourself for blood" scream. Megan and Ethan were playing with neighbor kids down on the playground. I looked out the window and saw Megan high tailing it toward the elevator.
I couldn't go down before she got to the elevator, so I just waited on our floor, listening as her scream grew more intense with each floor. When the doors opened, my eyes scanned her body thinking, "Where's the blood?" It was her big toe.
I scooped her up and took her to the bathroom, suspecting it was not as worse as the blood made it appear. I sat her down on the counter and she asked me, "Can you see all the way to my bone?"
Only a little girl who has been through the toe trauma she's experienced would even think to ask a question like that. My heart just broke for her and the fear she must have been feeling. She thought she'd done it all over again.
While I bandaged her toe, she said, "If only I had been wearing shoes, it wouldn't have happened. I should have been wearing shoes." She said a similar thing to me a few weeks at night. She said, "Mommy, if I'd paid attention to the sign that said to be careful, my magic toe would curl." For those of you new to reading my blog, she's referring to the great Croc vs. escalator incident of '08. It's hard to see her feel regret over choices that anyone would make. But a great opportunity to teach her how to extend grace to herself.
Winding Down
12 years ago
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